a kingdom built of seeds

Stillness, silence, and waiting are acts of faith. They are a willingness to face the nothingness, the emptiness, the void.

They authenticate a stark willingness to accept the possibility of hearing nothing, receiving no answers, gaining no direction. Sometimes (or often), it is silence for silence, darkness for darkness. But this is where we discover our motivation, asking: Do I come for the sake of getting, receiving, benefiting, or do I come for the sake of the One who calls, or simply for the sake of silence itself? Is simply being—without response from the Being—itself our reward? If I lay on my bed for minutes or hours or nights trying to listen and to hear, and nothing is given, nothing is spoken, are not the minutes, hours and nights themselves the sacrifice, the trust, the love that binds me to the One from whom there is no response? Perhaps silence is the best moment we can share with God, a gift only perceived by those willing to face the void of waiting without receiving, trusting without needing to gain.

What a tireless silence, if shared with such a beautiful God.

We are often not willing to risk the void that stillness and silence and waiting may lead to. Entering that void, we fear what we may see and hear and feel; more so, we fear that we may see, hear, and feel nothing at all. We fear the oblivion of facing our true selves, of being faced by God. And more than fearing what we might find is that we will find nothing at all.

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