Grace. This word sometimes overused and often misused and cheapened and ill-defined. Not only that, but a word frightening for what it implies, uncomfortable in its extravagance, easier kept at arm’s length since it’s beyond our control. When something undeserved is given freely, unconditionally, without merit, we hesitate. What’s the catch? Nothing in life is… Read More grace (1)
Enough about me. I won’t speak for God. But maybe he’s waiting for you to let go, give up, surrender. To own up to your true self and season. Honesty and openness (with a large dose of humility) is something he can work with. Performance and striving (especially without humility), less so. This doesn’t mean… Read More leaving (part 3)
I have stopped trying to be good and right, to fall in line and follow the rules. I have thrown away my former identities and associations in search of myself, my path, and God. Yes, from the outside it might look like leaving. Period. (To some, perhaps without redemption.) But so far in my experience,… Read More leaving (part 2)
I’ve been asking the question: “Who am I when I leave?” Who are we when we leave? Who are you when you leave? — Who we once were has bearing on who we are now. We cannot entirely disentangle from our past; it is intrinsically linked to our present. Who we are now is continually… Read More leaving (part 1)
We are not comfortable with silence. It’s the first thing to go when we have a to-do list, the easiest practice to neglect. There is the fear that if we don’t hear anything, it’s because we’re not listening. It’s our fault. How often have we heard it? “God’s always speaking; we’re the ones not listening.”… Read More silence (part 3)
We are weak flames barely burning. Our voices can say no more. Our ears can hear no more. With God, there’s no need. He lets us walk ahead, fall behind. He does not lead with pressure. He does not wait with impatience. He is not fickle or demanding. He does not hold our weaknesses, failures,… Read More the gift of silence (part 2)
“I won’t let you burn out. I won’t let you lose your light.” Some of us are weak flames barely burning. God will not extinguish us. Even a whisper could turn us pitch black. We are not a shimmering coal to be blown upon, igniting a new fire; just a weak flame barely burning. And… Read More the gift of God’s silence (part 1)
Have you ever entered a cave and gone deep enough to lose all light to pitch black when you turn off the headlamp, where the air is utterly still, sound ceases, the only way forward is on hands and knees, the only guidance is by tentative touch? I have. It’s perhaps the closest one can… Read More further still
“I’ve come to think sometimes that maybe I’m running a race I wasn’t asked to run.” A friend of mine said this to me recently, and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it. It’s a phrase that hits me right between the eyes. It hurts my heart to say it. When the words… Read More here not there
In a damp cathedral of towering firs in Oregon, I bend down, close my eyes, then raise them upward, my eyes and heart open. I pray. “You are my hunger and my food. My thirst and my water. My wound and my healing.” I was brought here for this holy moment in the light rain,… Read More in the wild (part 2)
a kingdom built of seeds 