Jesus
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round two
Already I’m nostalgic for what I just wanted to finish not so long ago. The simplicity. The minimalism. The rhythm of the day-to-day routine. Having only one focus, one requirement, one goal—to walk. Long days, big miles, pushing and challenging yourself. Out of your head and in your body. I didn’t love it or like Continue reading
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tell them what it’s like
Your whole person was formed to be someone specific—a faithful follower, a committed Christian, on fire for God. You look at all the words, models, and messages now; they appear so vastly different from here, on the outside, than from there, on the inside. There was the message but only one way to live it, Continue reading
awareness, bible, change, Christianity, church, deconstruction, doubt, evangelicalism, Faith, God, gospel, growth, Holy Spirit, hope, Jesus, love, peace, prayer, questions, reflections, religion, spirituality, surrender, transformation, Trust, truth -
this is what it’s like
How would I describe it? It’s like losing your way in a familiar place. The spaces that once brought you comfort are now sources of discomfort. Who you once were is now a stranger. The God who once felt so near is now distant. Your faith is far away. Your love is weak. You do Continue reading
awareness, bible, change, Christianity, church, deconstruction, doubt, evangelicalism, Faith, God, gospel, growth, Holy Spirit, hope, Jesus, love, peace, prayer, questions, reflections, religion, spirituality, surrender, transformation, Trust, truth -
I’m like you
I’m like you. If you’ve never had a vision. You don’t speak in tongues. When others around you seem to have an encounter with God, you have none. You’ve sat in a crowd of believers wondering, “Why not me? What’s wrong with me?” You’ve wondered what you’re missing, what you don’t have that others do. Continue reading
awareness, bible, change, Christianity, church, deconstruction, doubt, evangelicalism, Faith, God, gospel, growth, Holy Spirit, hope, Jesus, love, peace, prayer, questions, reflections, religion, spirituality, surrender, transformation, Trust, truth -
:static:
Sometimes I feel left in the dark. As if I have questions even God can’t answer. Or chooses not to. Why are we left alone when we are most in doubt? Sometimes silence is just what we need, even when we want anything but static. I no longer know what to ask. So silence is Continue reading
awareness, bible, change, Christianity, church, deconstruction, doubt, Faith, God, gospel, growth, Holy Spirit, hope, Jesus, love, peace, prayer, questions, reflections, religion, silence, spirituality, static, surrender, transformation, Trust, truth, weekly reflections -
you can’t give God everything
Intellectually and theologically I can’t state exactly what I “believe”. But I can feel and sense what I believe. I don’t think my way through life as much as feel my way through it. Is this wrong? Does this come back to “the heart is deceitful above all else”? Yet it says to love the Continue reading
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36
For perhaps the first time in my life I’m starting to feel my age, reaching the limits of my body. Stray gray hairs appear in my beard, like dying trees in a forest. Wrinkles under the eyes. I’m not young anymore. Nor am I old. Entering that middle stretch of life (God-willing). I realize how Continue reading
age, awareness, bible, birthday, change, Christianity, church, deconstruction, doubt, Faith, God, gospel, growth, Holy Spirit, hope, Jesus, love, peace, prayer, questions, reflections, religion, spirituality, transformation, Trust, truth, uncertain, weekly reflections -
everyone is invited
And he was teaching them and saying to them, “Is it not written, ‘My house shall be called a house of prayer for all the nations’? But you have made it a den of robbers…” And the blind and the lame came to him in the temple, and he healed them. We are told to Continue reading
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the gospel according to Jayber Crow
Now, finally, I really had lost all desire for change, every last twinge of the notion that I ought to get somewhere or make something of myself. I was what I was. “I will stand like a tree,” I thought, “and be in myself as I am.” – Jayber Crow Who told you that you Continue reading
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four years later
Four years ago I left my job at a church and everything changed. I changed. Fast forward. If you asked me, “What do you believe now?” I couldn’t give you a straight answer. (I hardly know, myself.) And you know what I’ve discovered? That’s okay. Not knowing is okay. Liminality is a very real existential Continue reading
a kingdom built of seeds 